Selasa, 05 April 2016

Its the wee hours of the morning and I am laying here in my bed, typing on my laptop, as sleep will not overcome me. again.

Ive been having this problem for awhile now. It comes and goes really, and was really very bad just a few short months ago when I was still in shock from losing Barry. And now its resurfacing: being tired, but restless, and unable to settle down and sleep. My mind going a million miles a minute, while my eyes burn from lack of shut-eye.

I took a Valerian root capsule and I am hoping that helps. At least I can be happy that I am laying in bed, and it was just shortly after midnight when I started typing this, rather than last night when I wasnt in bed till well after 2AM.

Today was my first full day of being an official homeowner!! Monday afternoon I got the call from my Realtor about 3:34 PM saying that the title had FINALLY recorded at County, and that the house was mine. HOORAY!! After the kids got home from school, my mom and I and the kids went over to the house to bring some stuff over. It was the first time I had been in the house without my Realtor, and it felt so surreal. I almost didnt feel right about it, because for the past month, I have only been in the house with him. And Ill be honest, I am going to miss him! He has done so much for me the past couple months weve been working together, and weve seen each other often. But I will be seeing him again, because he is going to be helping me with changing the garage door code, an getting me the mailbox key etc etc. Essentially, he is my "Barry" right now. He is doing a lot of the guy stuff for me that I havent delegated to my friend Jason, or my girlfriends husbands.

As I walked into the house yesterday afternoon, I made sure to put something very special on the fireplace mantle. It was the first official item that was placed in the house after it was in my name. And that item was the American flag that I was presented at Barrys funeral. It now sits ensconced in a cherry and glass triangular case, upon my mantle. I had actually thought about bringing Barrys Urn to put on top of there, but I decided against it because I didnt want to leave him in the house by himself! And yes, I laughed about that.

So now begins yet another chapter in our lives: A new house, new memories, new friends.

New Beginnings.

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