A Forgotten Milestone Day

Ive noticed that the last few days Ive been exceptionally cranky.

My attitude has been really crappy, Ive been snapping at the kids, I have a very short fuse. And Im just feeling under the weather.

But I couldnt put my finger on it, and today at MOPS a light bulb went off. I was talking to a friend there who asked how I was doing and I said I was OK, but it really comes and goes. I happened to glance down at my watch to check the time/date, and then it hit me.

December 15th. It was December 15th.

Exactly 10 years ago today I arrived in Germany to marry Barry. I left Edmonton, AB the night of the 14th, and arrived in Germany at 10:40 local time. And thus began the next 10 years of my life. We were married two weeks later.

Isnt it interesting how you forget days like this sometimes? And then it just hits you, and you realize that it affects you so much more than you realize. And the effects can last a few days even, as your body slowly recovers.

My appetite has been affected, as have been my moods. I was just exhausted this afternoon, and almost fell asleep on the couch. I had a headache as well, and a sore back.

Can I just sleep through till the middle of March so I can bypass all the sad days?

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A Year Of Memories

I have trouble blogging about Barry sometimes. I dont like to remember when I can help it, but sometimes I just need to do it. Honestly its just easier to go through each day and not think about him.

Its how I cope. I just forget most of the time.

So I had this idea to remember him this year. I thought that on every single special event, or day that is significant, I would post a memory of that day. Talk about why it is important, tell you all about my memory of that day, and share my feelings on it.

The first one that will be coming up is January 17th. Ill leave it at that. It was a really important day to me 11 years ago. After that comes the twins birthdays, then a day at the end of February. Then his birthday in March, As birthday in March, a day in April, etc etc. Most of these days are significant from the first year we knew each other, but other days have had special meaning throughout our marriage and our life together. Some months will have quite a few days of memories, and others will have only one if that. And if that month doesnt have a special day, then I will write about something that actually happened during that month sometime during our marriage.

Im looking forward to sharing with you all. It will give you all a glimpse into our lives and our past, while still allowing me to remember and grieve, and laugh, cry, be happy and sad all at the same time.

Look for the first "A Year of Memories" post on January 17th.

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